Sunday School News Summer 2010

Dear Friends,

Spiritual parenting is not about having more to do. In fact, it may well be about doing less, more deeply. It goes right to our three-year-olds’ most persistent question, “Why?”

We know that it’s important to have our own spiritual foundations in order to support our children in building theirs— and we can lose sleep worrying about how we will answer questions about God and death and meaning. Then we remember that we are Unitarian Universalist parents; we’ve chosen this faith because of what we already deeply believe: we are all works-in-progress. The most important things we can do for our kids’ spiritual journeys is to love them and to actively model how we travel on our own, whether we saunter, hike, climb, or trailblaze at any given time.

In your family’s spiritual life, remember the basic functions of a congregation—and the family is the smallest unit of congregation I know:

• Worship whether that means saying thanks for meals together or blowing kisses to the full moon.
• Action let your child develop an identity based on helping, whether your family are environmentalists, neighborhood cookie-bakers, school volunteers, blood donors, or LISTEN Center workers.
• Fellowship this is caring within the family; take care of each other, do anonymous acts of kindness, and catch each other being great!
• Learning whether it’s reading or telling moral tales; reviewing what will happen at a funeral and what you’re each expected to do; most of all, experiencing and dealing with strong feelings.

With a review of these core ideas, 22 parents of current Sunday scholars met on June 6 to strengthen our community connections and spark discussion among us.

We wondered: How do I teach childen to understand UUism and what we believe, including how to be good people and part of a community? How do I integrate what they learn in church into daily life? I’m curious to know if the lessons they learn in Sunday school are deep within them or just learned rote. How do I know they’re on the path? I value my children developing a sense of empathy—will the kids get that through the stories and the activities, and through our family’s activities?

We worried: If I don’t take a proactive approach to their spiritual development, the development will be guided by their peers’ families. I’m in a balancing act between our family’s values/expectations and trusting the kids to develop their own.

At the UUCUV, we appreciate the rituals that tie Sunday to Sunday and UU to UU:

• Naming and Dedication ceremony were very important to us: knowing we’re not alone, we have a whole community
• Placing the stones in the chalice passing Mother Earth
• The yoga in Sunday School
• Sharing the Children’s story gives the family a contact point
• The Gandhi prayer, the songs

We are passionate about our kids learning, knowing, being, becoming:

• People with a religious identity, a language of faith tradition for understanding others; empathic kids who speak up for those who can’t speak for themselves
• Ethicists
• People who understand and celebrate same-sex marriage
• People who have a safe place to explore meaning and making sense of the world, and do that in a real-life context people who act out of deep belief rather than guilt
• People who develop their own core values not being swept up in the mainstream
• People with an identity of openness and discovery and a sense of morality that is fairness and kindness

It can be about finding a worthy role model and letting your kids grow into being like that model.

And the UUCUV was asked specifically to help by supporting and providing:
1. Children’s community & activities outside of Sundays—particularly those which bring us closer to Nature, such as hiking Balch Hill
2.Parents’ community—quarterly, without the kids!
3. Parents’ time to think and work on our own spiritual ideas. “Spiritual parenting is my biggest job but I don’t have time to just think about it!”
4.Resources for home religious education
5. Contact information for this group


Look for all these things coming from the RE office in the next few months. This was time excellently well spent. Thank you to Joani Nierenberg and Claudia Kern, who volunteered to run children’s activities, and to Bonnie Bourdon and Margaret Robinson for a truly delicious lunch! Peanut butter and strawberries? All I can say is YUM!

A happy and blissful summer to all,


Peace,
Sparrow